I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
Randomize
