I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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