It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
