Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
