ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
