yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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