She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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