yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
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