if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Randomize