dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
