Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Randomize
