Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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