i just google imaged poop.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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