i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
