I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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