What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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