She said her name was "party"
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
