i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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