You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize