All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
