I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
