I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
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