I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.