Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
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