Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
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