cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your solution always to masturbate
Because it usually works
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize