5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
