So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
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yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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