i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize