There is a strange man mowing my lawn. Best day ever.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
As shirtless as possible
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
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