obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
