so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Randomize
