So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
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