so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
Randomize
