I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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