Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!