I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
Randomize
