where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
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Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Found my phone laying in a snow angel outside my apt this morning.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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