Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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