I'm eating all of the evidence.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
