did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
Randomize
