If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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