It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
