Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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