i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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