My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Got in a bar fight defending Prince. Thought you ought to know. He gets his dick sucked cooking eggs for breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize