Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
