Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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