It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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