why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
